Members of the Satanic Temple have performed a ‘Pink Mass’ over the grave of Westboro Baptist Church founder Fred Phelps Jr.’s mum. A ‘Pink Mass’ is a Satanic ritual performed over the graves of the dead that turns their spirits gay.
“We believe that Fred Phelps is obligated to believe that his mother is now gay in the afterlife. Further, if beliefs are inviolable rights, nobody has the right to challenge our right to believe that Fred Phelps believes that his mother is now gay.”
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We don’t know much about Satanism but we’re going to take the Satanic Temple’s word for it – having gays and lesbians frolicking above your grave definitely turns your dead spirit gay. Definitely won’t make you any straighter, that’s for sure. So there you go Fred Phelps – your dead mum is a homosexual now.
Seriously though, how terrible a person do you have to be so that even devil worshippers hate you? These people worship SATAN – the prince of darkness, the king of all evil and wrongdoing. And even they think the Westboro Baptist Church are dickheads. That’s how you know you’re the lowest of the low, when even people who devote their lives and prayers to Satan can’t stand you.
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You have to love the Satanists’ head-fucking though; properly giving the WBC a dose of their own medicine. Trolling the ultimate kings of trolling. This Pink Mass works, you just have to take their word for it, just like the WBC insists you take their word on their “God hates fags/fornicators” propaganda.
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The only way the WBC can come back from this one is if Fred Phelps goes and protests an anti-gay message over his own mother’s grave. That would be the greatest comeback of all time and we’d all have to accept the WBC as troll kings, no matter how much we hate them.